Tag Archives: Grandparents

Day 2871: 4 Years Gone But Still So Loved And Never Forgotten

Love never dies – that’s what I keep reminding myself

It’s 12 : 36 PM on day 2871 of my journey towards independence and I managed to pray, read a Bible verse spend time outside and do some work.

Today marks the four year anniversary of my paternal grandmother’s death I thought the passing of time would somehow ease the ache but some days the pain of her absence crushes me like it did the day she died and I find myself missing her fish fry, our physiotherapy sessions and her funny life stories but most of all I miss sitting across from her and holding her hand (our house hasn’t changed much since before she died we use the same dining table and I sleep in the same room she used to run into every time I called the memories are part suffocating and part comforting).. I miss you every day Ammachi but I know you’re alive every time I remember you and I do so often with fondness and a smile.

Day 2800: Rest in Peace Ammachi

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Death is a reminder of the temporariness of life– that’s what I’ve realized.

I don’t feel like doing anything today.

Yesterday morning my maternal grandmother passed away I am sad but also grateful she is no longer suffering I will miss our weekly phone calls when we talked about everything and nothing everything has changed and yet the sun is still shining I wished it rained for a few days this sunny weather is insulting me for some reason (even the way I pray has changed every morning I prayed bless mommy, daddy, Neethu, Kevin, aunts, uncles, cousins, ammachi while today I prayed mommy, daddy, Neethu, Kevin, aunts, uncles, cousins, ammachi..ammachi’s soul it almost seems cruel that the world is still spinning when my family is so sad].Rest in peace Ammachi we mourn your death but mostly we celebrate your beautiful life. We love you and we will always keep you in our hearts.

Day 299

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Whoever said every cloud has a silver lining was telling the God’s honest truth – that’s what I learned today.

It’s 7: 43 PM on day 299 of my journey towards independence and I’ve managed to brush my teeth, tweet about my Clean Water For All Campaign – no luck –read My Kid Will Never Go To College on Kveller, That was Then, This is Now on Chaing Rainbows and Special needs things that make you go “ARRRGH!” on Love That Max – reading all three of these blog posts has made me fall in love with blogging all over again because although all three of these people are parents to kids who have “special needs” they all have different perspectives – feed myself rice and curry for lunch, prepare my Kid of the Week feature for tomorrow, listen to music, tweet about my campaign some more – still no luck 🙁 – feed myself avocado on whole-grain bread for dinner and brush my teeth once more.

As I’ve mentioned in previous posts my grandmother has what appears to be Dementia – my family has taken her to a doctor and he says it’s just part of the aging process – and although I am deeply saddened that her mental health has taken a turn for the worse there is a tiny part of me – I can’t believe I’m actually typing this I feel SO guilty – that is happy that I am no longer the “sick one” in this family before I felt SO claustrophobic because my mother was with me 24/7 – apart from when she was sleeping or at work – now she’s too busy tailing my grandma to care what I’m doing. Do you see the silver lining in your dark cloud?

Are we connecting on Twitter? If not, say hi at http://twitter.com/Nisha360

If you’ve given to my cause or you can’t give now, please help me by sharing my cause with others. You can tweet about it like my friend Stan Faryna. This is the tweet he uses: @Nisha360 is a brave, smart young woman trying to make a better world for us all. Please help her do an amazing thing. http://bit.ly/hC7vOu

Stan’s very sweet for saying so, but feel free to write what reflects you best.

Thanks to all my friends out there who are helping me make my dream come true: to make a better world for all of us!

Day 297

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A few hours can make a huge difference – that’s what I learned today.

It’s 7: 29 PM on day 297 of my journey towards independence and I’ve managed to brush my teeth, feed myself leftovers from last night’s barbecue for breakfast, watch TV, tweet about my Clean Water For All Campaign – no luck – listen to music, tweet about my campaign some more – still no luck 🙁 – and feed myself rice and curry for dinner.

Last night while listening to music I thought that the best way for me to pray was through my actions but today as I awoke to the overpowering smell of urine – my grandma had urinated on our bedroom floor yesterday morning – I realized that there was nothing I could do to fix her so I prayed Our Father, who art in heaven, hallowed be thy name. Thy Kingdom come, thy will be done, on earth as it is in heaven. Give us this day our daily bread. And forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive those who trespass against us. And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil. For thine is the kingdom, the power and the glory. for ever and ever. Amen. I am sorry for every bad thing I’ve ever done please help my grandma surely all my good deeds count for something. Has a few hours changed your whole life?

Are we connecting on Twitter? If not, say hi at http://twitter.com/Nisha360

Stan’s very sweet for saying so, but feel free to write what reflects you best.

Thanks to all my friends out there who are helping me make my dream come true: to make a better world for all of us!

Day 296

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You teach people how to treat you. – Dr. Phil C. McGraw

It’s 10: 23 PM on day 296 of my journey towards independence and I’ve managed to brush my teeth, feed myself toast, mutton sausage and fried tomatoes for breakfast, watch TV, feed myself rice and curry for lunch, do some research on Dementia – it breaks my heart to see my granny becoming less and less of herself and unfortunately it seems that all I can do is sit back and watch because the treatment options for Dementia are very limited 🙁 – read two of the most recent post on Love That Max and Top 9 why you should blog on The Nicky Blog – all the blog posts I read were very good but since I’d never read Nicky’s blog before naturally I was more excited to read that and the fact that I could attest to the 9 reasons why you should blog made it all the better 🙂 – tweet about my Clean Water For All Campaign – yesterday evening Tana (@woveneye3) made a PayPal donation which I will donate to my campaign on her behalf ASAP and Bonnie (@bonnie67) made two more donations – you guys are AWESOME thank you SO much for your support 🙂 – play host to my extended family who came over for dinner – my aunt almost ended up in tears when my father said grandma didn’t remember the names of her girl children because they didn’t take of her my father didn’t mean anything by it but I saw my aunt’s face when he said that and she was REALLY hurt 🙁 – and brush my teeth once more.

Last night after we came back from dinner at my uncle’s a community member of ours – let’s call him M – called and said he would be coming to our house in ten minutes to borrow our GPS and immediately my dad said with urgency to no one in particular M is coming take Nisha to the other room and in that moment instead of feel less than and going to my room like I usually did I said rather nonchalantly what’s wrong if I’m here to which he responded oh no nothing I just thought you wanted to pee which I did not believe for a second but for the sake of keeping the peace I let it go and asked my mother to help me in the bathroom. Have you taught people to treat you badly?

Are we connecting on Twitter? If not, say hi at http://twitter.com/Nisha360

Stan’s very sweet for saying so, but feel free to write what reflects you best.

Thanks to all my friends out there who are helping me make my dream come true: to make a better world for all of us!

Day 292

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Having a unique perspective on the world can be an extraordinary asset, whether it be in the labour force or the marketplace of ideas or simply as a good friend. – Shasta (author of Outrageous Fortune)

It’s 8: 26 PM on day 292 of my journey towards independence and I’ve managed to brush my teeth, feed myself Batura for breakfast, go to my brother’s friend’s holy communion party – it was nice enough I made friends with the pastor’s wife who stuck out like a sore thumb amongst all the Indians – the pastor and his wife were white – in spite of the fact that I was thinking about my grandma most of the time (see the next paragraph to understand why) – tweet about my Clean Water For All Campaign – no luck – and brush my teeth once more.

As you know I have been discriminated against all my life because of my disability which is why I felt sick to my stomach when my entire family decided unanimously that they would leave my grandma in the care of the housekeeper while all of us went to a party although no one else seemed to have any qualms about it. Does your unique perspective on life make it impossible for you to be indifferent towards another?

Are we connecting on Twitter? If not, say hi at http://twitter.com/Nisha360

Stan’s very sweet for saying so, but feel free to write what reflects you best.

Thanks to all my friends out there who are helping me make my dream come true: to make a better world for all of us!